Lady Luck, be with me on 31 May.

Haha, end of term was today, but it was the first time I didn't get too happy and excited about it. Rather weird. When everyone are like, 'Yes! June Holidays!' We are like ' Fuck, 4 more days to O levels?!' Maybe I will pass, maybe I will fail. If I want to pass, hopefully the SOS I sent to Lady Luck was heard. Haha. Please please please, I just want to scrape through, and get one subject off my chest. But if I fail, I accept, because I don't think last minute hard work will do. Blame myself. I brought myself into this mess, and hopefully I will get myself out of it.


Oh, and got back my result slip, was like damn bad. I think I can kiss SAJC goodbye and hello to SRJC at this rate. Haha. L1R5: 29, class position: 7, level position: 81. fml. It's like a big mountain to climb to reach my goal. Haiz, just try my best lor, if I'm fated to be stupid, then I will land in SR. Haha.


Guess the next few nights will be sleepless ones, random thoughts will just appear. No going out, or anything. But I actually wanted to go for troop camp this year, like it's at Punggol,  and I can actually sleep in an air-con room if I went, since I'm a venture already. Haha. But, I sort of lost interest in Ventures, maybe I will just pledge myself to my new CCA in the future and snub Ventures. Everything have to end one day. Okay, guess I have nothing else to say, just that my next post should be after Chinese 'O'. ALL THE WAY!  加油！

Do I really look like a gay and a smoker?

Where is the love?

No words can match my feelings right now, but this is such a big matter I have to blog this down. When I am up high with confidence, you have to pull me down. Of all people, it have to be you. But fact is, I never like you. Reasons are many, but I'm not saying any here. I had such a good day until you have to blow it off. Guess a least you deserve is a thank you right? I'm already putting my best effort to make sure everything is going well but you have to demoralise me. That isn't cool. I have to applaud you, or maybe treat you to an expensive restaurant , you broke my deadlock of crying. Well, believe it or not, it's the third time this year and I'm starting to think it is natural to cry. What's worse? My parents saying I am being sensitive about this, haha. Even Jesus will side with me. Well, I think there's a positive side of this, my hate towards you have given me the motivation to beat you. Thrash is a much better word. Because I know at the end of the day, it will all pay off and you will be crawling towards your dad in tears. Not me. Fuck you.


Yeah, I had been mugging my ass off for Chinese, which is good. And everything is quite positive so far, but paper 2 is still quite a bitch. I am finding the momentum, I know my breakthrough is coming at any moment and at the right time. All I can say is screw all the negative thoughts, I WILL PASS. I KNOW I CAN. CAN CAN CAN! Miss Wong, sorry but I will be your 'boyfriend' for the next week. Haha.


I just have no motivation to blog. Well, I was wondering what is love for the past few days? Is it just about sex? Or what? I want to feel it. But when? Or never?

Oh, and Inter won the Treble! YAY!

Okay, I feel much better after blogging this down. :)

District 13.

I don't know. I was too lazy to think of a title. And I'm tired, so I will keep this post a short one. Exams are over, but Chinese 'O' is 16 days away. I'm not nervous, just anxious. I don't want to think too much about the result. I want to slack till Monday, and then hardcore Chinese intensive kicks in. Oh, and this post isn't from a 15 year old anymore, its a 16 year old. Yes, I've aged. So what? I can watch NC16 movies and I did just that on Wednesday. My first NC 16 show, district 13 was okay... Now looking forward to M18. Haha.

Urm, the ticket. My camera sucks, so the lousy quality.

Is it just me or does Jeric look like Benjamin Koh here?

 Uh, and Benjamin Ng is gay, he freaking took a blackmail photo of me. But gym session was fun yesterday though. But was spoiled by some guy who was PMSING. He was like ' how long more do you need for the bench?' I said 'I do one more set.' He replied with the same question. How retarded is he? And he threw tantrums, he was throwing the weights everywhere. I am not going to say anything else about that guy. Haha. And today's soccer was fun. Top scorer today. So Benjamin, it's just not about you being the best here, it's about me too. And my specs bent, whacked 3 times by Ben and Joseph in the face. Ohoh, and I find basketball fun. Haha, maybe I will try it after 'O' but I can't seem to study at home. Even the bed is so distracting, there are like soft toys here andthere and I'm tempted to play with it. Screw myself.

Tell me how study?

Okay lah, I'm lazy to add on. I really don't have the mood to go into blogging now. Bye.

  

"A man who dares waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life."

Mayday!

It's May already and starting have to a deep fear inside of me. I want to to go into SAJC badly and sometimes, I just have flashfowards, like when I'm collecting my results and breaking down into tears because I failed. I want to be in SA for 12 straight years, and not wanting this fairytale to end this year. I remembered the effort put in the gangshow was tremendous, but the results was shit. I'm putting in my blood, sweat and tears into this for something, not for someone or any valuable item. And if my  l1r5 is based on how hardworking I am, I would be in RJC already. I just hope the next 5 4 months will be put well together. There's not much time to make a difference.

Recently, I realise I have this demon inside of me. It is called anger. I just can't find myself able to control it when some situation arises. I remembered when I was in primary school, I got so pissed by some faggot that I punched him up. That loser cried. Luckily, I wasn't as hot-headed for the past 3 years or I would have gone to serious trouble. If you think I'm always a guy who always keep his cool, it's time for me to break that bubble. And I don't know, I like to provoke others but not when others do the same to me. I need a real attitude adjustment. Hopefully, I won't must not find trouble with a new loser I found in someone. The arrogance in him boils my blood and the devil is just waiting to be unleashed. Please... keep myself cool.

Okay, let's stop these emo talks and talk about what happened recently. Finished 2 subjects already, English was pretty fine, should be able to reach my target but as for Chinese, the same can't be said. Many people said it's 'A' level standard, but I won't agree. It is just that we lack practice, that's all. It's 30 days away from 'O' and it can't be a worse time to demoralise us. After MYE, it's just me and Chinese, no other subjects, and If I fail, I would just drop to CLB. I won't take the risk it to retake and possibly, fail again. o.O Haha, and guess what?! Physics and SS are on my birthday, woohoo! NOT! The 2 papers I dread most and least confidence in. Hopefully my birthday will play a factor in me doing well for these 2 subjects. Haha, like real. I got the confidence in my veins for everything, so it should be fine. Ohoh, and I want to gym and play soccer badly. Staying at home everyday to study and eat sucks, you can see the family pack again. GAHH!!!

Okay, shall finish up on differentiation and chem before I sleep. (:

3 more days to SIXTEEN!

30 more days to CHINESE 'O'!

And ouch, I accidentally cut my thumb while shaving.